So, I may have mentioned that I’m presently in a state of flux – a transitioning period, if you will. Riding on that crazy rollercoaster of life and all that jazz.
Okay, fine, here’s the deal – I’m not working. And, I’m kinda struggling with it. (and the financial struggle is on its way. hooray.)
I have options I’m working on and I’m waiting, not so patiently, to see which “option”
rears its ugly head pops up first.
You see, sitting still is NOT something I excel at. I mean, being on vacation or out camping is one thing but being home all day with NO plan or set date to return to a day job is tough. I’m a planner and kind of a control freak, and right now, it’s all out of my hands.
Now, I don’t need to clarify, but since I feel that I should, I’m in this spot by choice. I made a career change and that change turned out to not be the right thing for me and I left. I don’t want you to think I got fired or anything. I mean, it’s not like it’s even your business but I’m a truth teller and I’m still a work in progress when it comes to other people’s opinions of me and I’m just throwing it out there. For what it’s worth.
So, I guess the real crux of the matter is what am I going to do.
We’re not really a one-salary family and, well, I tend to get bored (what? who, me?) and need something to do. And being a stay-at-home mom is not really necessary any more. I mean, I’m no longer wrangling my 2 Things around. I have grandthings, for crying out loud! I’ve been home now for almost 3 weeks and I’ve done all the yard work, cleaned out the garage, obliterated a wasp nest, cleaned the house, done all the laundry, rearranged some furniture, baked up a storm, gone for a multitude of walks, got the brakes fixed on my husband’s truck, read a book (um, btw, that’s a big deal since I didn’t think I had time to read a book!!), cooked loads of dinners (and breakfasts. that sailor of mine is one lucky dude. #justsaying), and I have been BORED. OUT. OF. MY. SKULL.
I know what I WANT to do and it’s a complete and total shift from where I’m at and it’s SUPER scary to think about. And, it’s not likely to bring me a decent salary for a while. But, life and passion and happiness aren’t all about money, right?
And then, there’s the “what I feel like I SHOULD do” option. You know the one – find a desk job in my current field and probably not earn enough money for all my experience. The one where I’ll have a salary and probably have money to do fun things besides pay the bills but where I won’t be challenged or excited or feel like I’m doing something really REALLY useful.
I’m trying real hard to believe that “what’s supposed to happen WILL” but it’s stressing me out. Because I just have to wait.
Hi. Remember me? I’m that impatient control freak. Ugh.
I honestly do believe that things happen for a reason. Maybe that misguided career change was designed to put me right in this very spot so I could finally make the correct decision for my life?
*sigh*Waiting for fate to play her cards. Do things really happen for a reason? Click To Tweet