STRATEGIES TO QUIET YOUR NEGATIVE INTERNAL VOICE (TOL#11)

As you know, Fit Nana is a little “new” in the blogging world. I personally have been blogging for about 6 years now but Fit Nana didn’t start until last year. A mere 7 months ago. So, technically this Nana is still an infant! (that gives me permission to cry when I want something or am tired or don’t get what I want, right? No? Oh. Well, that’s a bummer.) And, even though I have that experience, it’s pretty much like I’ve just started from scratch. And that’s both a little scary and frustrating.

I’m still trying to find my voice, figure out the direction I want to go, and discover what’s best for both me and Fit Nana, as well as dealing with a complete change in my career and the stress of heading back to school. All of this uncertainty, change, and stress is prime fodder for that Negative Nancy that lives in my head. (she sucks. we’re not friends. Yes, I call her Nancy.)  And then, I’m stuck battling those feelings of fear and of not being “good enough.”

I’m pretty familiar with those negative internal voices having battled self-esteem issues my whole life. Toss in being shy and an introvert and my positive internal voice was barely a whisper, if she even showed up, and was frequently drowned out by those negative ones. I’ve actually come a long way and my positive voice can usually kick the everliving snot out of Negative Nancy these days. #beastmode Until I’m doing something new or something I’m not skilled at or something that’s HARD (like blogging – yes, blogging can really be hard sometimes when you’re just starting and trying to get people to want to stop by and read.) And then, boom, hey Nancy! Welcome back!

strategies to quiet negative voice

Well, I don’t know about you but DAMN, battling that negative beeyotch can be exhausting! I mean, there are definitely days that I feel like giving in – wouldn’t that be so much easier? And yeah, it actually probably would be easier to curl up into a ball and stick your head in the ground but that is most definitely NOT the right thing to do.

So, what can you, and I, do to quiet that Negative Nancy? What are some strategies for quieting those negative voices?

1. Believe in Yourself

I know. It seems simple but it really can be incredibly difficult to do. Especially when you’re doing something new. I mean, if you’ve never done it, how can you believe that you can do it? Well, think back to when you were a little kid. How much fear did you have back then? Probably not much. Most kids just climb a tree, walk a fence, jump off the diving board, or EVEN just take their first steps without a single thought to whether or not they can do it. They just DO IT. (I would have used that as a strategy but I guess Nike’s got the market cornered on that one. Pfft. Fine.) There’s never any doubt in a small child’s mind. You (and I) have to get ourselves back to that. Look in the mirror, look yourself in the eyes, and say OUT LOUD, “I CAN do this.” “I WILL do this.”

2. Motivational Quotes

You can find these literally everywhere. They are all over the internet, there’s books full of them, and hell, you can even buy a desk calendar that has a new one every day. Most people just look at them and move on, without really even thinking about what they read or letting it sink in and affect them. Find one that truly speaks to you, makes you open your eyes, makes you pause and think about it and apply it to your life. Print them out, or write them down, and put them where you will see them. The mirror is a GREAT place. I mean, you look in it every day – why not have that little reminder up in the corner?

Back in September, I heard something that made me pause and really rethink the direction I was going in. I truly believe I needed to hear it at the time and that’s what finally propelled me down my new path towards the career in fitness that I’ve wanted for quite some time. “I will not be defined by what I do but rather, who I am.” Spoke volumes to me. <3

Strategies to quiet negative voice

3. Find Someone to Talk To

There’s no shame whatsoever in needing someone to talk to, especially when you’re stuck in a difficult time or are struggling with some serious negative self-talk. Whether you turn to your spouse, a friend, your mom, or a licensed therapist, all that matters is you find a way to talk it out. Often, when we’re struggling with negative self-worth or self-image, we get just SO FOCUSED on the facts LIES that we are telling ourselves and we can’t see past them. Having someone to listen and offer a different viewpoint or remind us that we actually do NOT suck and should not go stick our heads in that hold in the ground is pretty awesome and definitely keeps us from having to clean all that dirt out of our ears.

Got a Negative Nancy chattering away in your head? Try these strategies to quiet her down.… Click To Tweet

So, even as I’m writing this, I’ve got Nancy chattering away telling me this post isn’t perfect, people aren’t going to read (if you’re reading, HI! Thank you for stopping by!), my graphic isn’t good enough, etc. But, you know what. It is GOOD ENOUGH. I am GOOD ENOUGH.

And SO. ARE. YOU. Don’t forget to tell yourself that and while you’re at it, tell Nancy to go F herself.

QUESTIONS:

  • Are you a perfectionist? 
  • Do you have a mantra?
  • What’s your favorite motivational quote?

Thanks, Amanda, for letting me Think Out Loud.

4 COMMENTS

  1. Christina Nifong | 3rd Feb 17

    Saved this in my inbox till I could have a chance to read it. I too struggle with Negative Nancy. I too find blogging to be really hard. I’ve been trying to get back to writing after taking 10-no-15 years off to stay home with my kids and every day I think: I cannot do this! It’s too hard! Thanks for your honest words. They will lift me up when I am down….

    • Jennifer
      Jennifer | 3rd Feb 17

      It IS really hard sometimes. It takes so much more effort to be positive than negative. What’s the saying? It takes more muscles to smile than to frown? Or something like that? … I think that once you do two things (with regards to blogging) – find your voice and appreciate your writing for what it gives to yourself, not others – that it becomes easier. I mean, you WANT people to read and you WANT people to come back and you WANT to write things that people want to read but if YOU aren’t happy with what you’re writing, you’re never going to feel good enough. For the record, I enjoy reading your writing. And I’m totally looking forward to making that black bean sweet potato soup. YUM! And I most certainly do appreciate your comments. I’m glad to know that I may lift you up when you’re down. You shouldn’t be down. You are just SO MUCH. Never sell yourself short!

  2. Heather @ Polyglot Jot | 20th Jan 17

    I really struggle with this too! That meme made me laugh hahaha! 😀 Thanks for the tips–I’ll definitely be trying these out to shut up that mean voice!

    • Jennifer
      Jennifer | 20th Jan 17

      I’m sorry to hear that your internal voices can be brats, too. 🙁 We really can be so hard on ourselves, can’t we? UGH. And it totally cracked me up, too! Her face, though. Hahaha! I hope the tips help out! I seriously have little motivating quotes all over my house. Most days I don’t even notice them but it seems that I do when I really need to. Thanks so much for sharing! Have a great weekend!

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